HOW TO WIN US BY ALI AMEEN (PART 1)

 

She has to be fair, tall, curvy, long hair, have a killer smile, brainy, respectful, great cook" etc.....

And on and on I hear a lot of guys churn out attributes they desire from their ideal woman. From the ridiculous to the not-so-ridiculous, I have heard them all. For most if not all, they seek for an out of planet type lady. One who would come and fill up all those voids men have. Oh yes! We do have them alright and believe me, some of these voids take a whole lot of filling. Ladies? You got your work cut out for you. 😎.



So.. Everyday I get inundated with these "types" and one thing I have come to realize is, most of us men share certain similarities when it comes to the choice of our ladies. For instance, most men like their mothers. Now what I mean by that is naturally, men are nothing more than big emotional babies. Forget the machoism and burga, deep down we yearn for attention, care and affection. Same way our mothers care for us, is the same way we desire such care from a woman. We love to be tampered. Sure, not with material things and all but by simply giving attention to those little things that might not seem a big deal generally, but they mean so much to a man. Saying things like, "Have you eaten?" "Babe you need to rest. You've been working so hard lately" , "if only all men were like you, all ladies would be happy" etc and doing little things like, wearing his cap in a playful manner when you're together, offering to drive when going out or run an errand for him once in a while. These are the sort of things that most men wish their ladies would do for them. Unfortunately, most men can't voice out these demands because as always, we have to keep up with the macho appearance. 👎. At best, we indirectly whine and make subtle comparisons with some other relationships to get our message across. Like I said, men are babies. Understand babies and trust me ladies, you are on your way to unraveling the mystery behind a man.

Another shared similarity most men have in their choice of an "ideal" woman, is having an intellectually stimulating type of woman. You know, someone who could hold down her own when serious topics are discussed. One who loves to pick your brain, debate issues with you, proffer sound sokutions to some complex issues . Basically, someone with a got head screwed between her shoulders. Even though the optics most especially in the north might seem contrary, trust me when I tell you there's nothing more that makes a man do better in life than a woman who pushes and challenges him intellectually. Men are naturally driven by ego, so having a brainy woman makes it all the more interesting. While he tries to assert his dominance, she also tries to prove her salt. Fireworks!

Have you ever heard of a saying: "Let a man be a man"? Well yes, a man loves a woman who allows him be a man. I love a woman who let's me be a man. As a man, I need to hang out with the boys. I need my football weekend. I need you to listen to me when I talk to you. I need, I need, I need. Every man needs. And no, it isn't about control because I hear a lot of people say men are control freaks. I beg to disagree. Yes we are egoistical by nature so it's only natural we feed that. It's like telling a woman she's beautiful everyday. It's vain, but it makes her feel nonetheless. That doesn't mean she's narcissistic. Same with us, it's not control, it's just letting a man be a man.